shaun is turnig out to be an interesting older brother. Hes completely grilling my friend david about his intentions with me. And when he found out I overdosed he freaked out. Telling me to stop and tons of things Ive already heard before. When I asked him to give me a good reason to stop he said because i could die and because its illegal. Either way I dont really care. He found out I cut and said he cant stop me but he would like it if i stop. He knows some of the things Ive been through, and he gave me really good advice...
his advice was fuck the past. You cant do anything to change it or make it better. But you can make your present and future.
my ideas on that are basically the same except I live for the present because I dont see me liivng long enough to have a future. And I dont really know why that is. I just dont think I have a future.
I have an important meeting with my school tomorrow. So im going to overdose tomorrow and try and get a buzz so I dont freak out too much.